I clean a music studio once a month. I looked down at my bucket, and.. well. I can’t quite describe all the feelings I had. I remember there was a time in my life I was quite adamant that I would **never** have a job cleaning bathrooms, and yet.. at that moment, there I was about to do that very thing. And I felt so much gratitude for that bucket of water.
My life seems to bounce around extremes, sometimes simultaneously. During the next couple of weeks I’ll be decorating a house that is amazingly delightfully over the top. And no, I can’t share pictures; it’s one of the conditions of my working there. This is year three!
A practice I want to reignite: I would do any “job” for awhile, save up my money, then take a sabbatical and focus on something that reflects my true heart. It’s given me something to look forwards on both sides of that journey.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the concepts of devotion and dedication lately. To me, they are similar, but not the same.
Devotion I see as coming from a place of loving attention. Dedication as more of a practical nature, and commitment to a process/ideal/cause. They work in partnership, the dance of loving attention and practical commitment complementing each other, and nurturing the journey.
I’m feeling on the cusp of Something Really Big and Good lately. I know what some of it is, and feeling frustration around my survival gig not allowing the flexibility I think I need to do it. I would love to have the resources to fully jump into what I know is my What’s Next, but I don’t. So I’m working with the constraints of perceived lack of time and resources, and finding a way to make it all happen anyway.
Choosing to see my survival gig as a venue to hone my skills of interacting with all kinds of people, communicating, sharing, sending out love and healing. (You’d be surprised how many people come shopping in search of healing). Learning how to exchange energy without being depleted, because if what I feel is coming for me is coming, and I work to make it happen, there’s gonna be a whole lotta ‘xchangin’ goin’ on.
I know this is more rambly than usual. Some feelings are hard to put into words.
If you made it this far, thank you! I love you, and I can’t wait to discover together and share what’s next!