inspiration, journaling, meditation, mindfulness, Personal Development, Personal growth, spirituality, Uncategorized

Shadows

As I was sitting in the plumeria grove yesterday, drifting in and out of meditation, I looked down to see my left hand completely in shadow, and my right hand completely lit up.

I’ll admit. I spent a bit of time figuring out how to photograph it; it was quite lovely. I settled back in again. Enjoying the solitude, the breeze, watching the parrots’ sideways walking on the branches.

I began to think of shadows.. and the concept of shadow work. So many times when shadow work is talked about, it’s meant the parts of us we don’t like. Or trauma we have experienced. Things we’ve shoved way back in our brain cupboards. Unwanted, and yet, we can’t quite bring ourselves to get rid of them either.

And then I thought… “what if” … and if you’ve known me any length of time you know how fond I am of “what if” being a jumping off point for exploration rather than a tsunami of anxiety….

What if there are things in the shadows that are wonderful, and precious, and maybe our deepest true self? Tucked away because they were “too”. Too odd. Too bold. Too different. Maybe tucked away out of fear of losing what is familiar- groups of people we relate to, too big a challenge to our sense of self. Hidden behind a big ol’ box of What Will Other People Think. Requiring the deepest relational commitment of all. To our Self.

This and. Not either or.

As we look into the shadows, healing wounds and discovering treasures, it’s important to be compassionate with ourselves, and with others. There might be a whole lot of internal work that happens that will shock people who knew one aspect of you, when they suddenly meet your next incarnation

(there can be many incarnations within one lifetime, I feel)

Like back in high school math class, when I sometimes just knew the answer to a complex problem. The teacher would challenge me to “show my work” and I couldn’t, because I simply knew the answer by looking at it.

One of my friends has been posting amazing images of all the monarch butterflies emerging in their yard this Spring. It’s amazing to watch the chrysalis go from a green and gold jewel to clear, and then the butterfly makes its way out, transformed.

I have so many life shifts happening right now. The very pragmatic and fast approaching need to find where “home” is next. Work that is not so hard on my body and spirit. And beautiful inner alchemy.

So yes, I may seem the same, yet somehow different. I can hardly wait to step out of the shadows, into the light.

Shining.

Radiant.

And to hug those I love so much.T

hanks for reading.I love you.

focus, journaling, meditation, mindfulness

Meanderings of the Mind

I dreamt my brain went flying through space on its own adventure. I made this collage to honour the occasion.

When I have the luxury of waking up naturally, I like to lay in my bed and follow the meanderings of my mind.

Today I woke up excited to choose a topic for meditation. I already had chosen a theme for the week- senses, from my reading in training to become a certified meditation teacher- and landed on movement. I like sometimes to choose a topic and tell my brain “today is… run with it”. I landed on the sense of movement for today.

I lay there for awhile stretching.. dancing with my hands, enjoying moving and noticing the flow and connection with my breath.

I thought of light, and sound, and how object are all vibrations of molecules. How in one way or another, all is light and sound. All is vibration.

My worth thinking paused, and I played mind movies of some of my favourite light and sound moments. The play of light and shadow on leaves. Music, The sound of a beloved person’s voice.

I thought of movement and stillness. About how the extremes impede growth. too much movement can become chaos or exhaustion. Too much stillness can become complacency or stagnation. I gave time to thinking about how I could present these concepts in a corporate mindfulness setting.

I thought about paper being a vibrational transformation of the plants it’s usually made from. How paper is both an offering and a sacrifice. Unless it’s 100% recycled, most paper in its origin was a plant that was sacrificed to become paper. It becomes an offering to be written on, created with, exchanged as a means of value, and so on.. Every time now when I use paper, I will take a moment to thank the trees.

I jumped more to thinking about vibrations; thinking about the vibration of thought itself. I thought of brain furrows and how they remind me of the plowed fields behind my house growing up.

Suddenly I;d found I’d made myself small. My kidhood self. Hooded jacked, rainboots… walking the fields/brain furrows. Stopping and bending down looking for treasure, which were I grew up was usually agates.

I thought of how I could use this image….. wandering the furrows of my brain… as a device to bring me deeper.

I wondered if my Mom still has a particular large agate. On I remember being as big as my hand, and to ask her to take a picture of it to send to me.

My brain gradually slowed until there was simply the process of waking, and thinking it was time to get out of bed.

I stretched and said out loud “Thank was beautiful. Thank you.”

There is no requirement to still the mind, or sit just so to meditate. It’s more about a deeper connection with Self. You can lay in your bed, sit in a chair, get up and dance, go for a hike, get lost in creating art, listening to music. Let your mind show you the adventure of the moment.

Ah! That was beautiful. Thank you!

Attachment, inspiration, meditation, mindfulness, Personal growth, spirituality

Holy Ground

Before I knew of such things as chakras, and Saturn returns, I drew this oh so long ago

Recently I’ve begun training to become a meditation teacher, and all of us in the virtual class are so exuberant, and diving in full soul.

Many are sharing pictures of their meditation nooks/spaces/rooms. Beautiful spaces all, complete with lovely tapestries, altars, and such.

I have little informal I suppose you could call altars throughout my house. Little groupings of items collected or gifted over the years. Musical instruments in one corner, the marble cafe table from an ancestor’s store with the shop bell, crystals, a microscope and discarded cards I find on walks. But I really don’t have any one spot I consistently go to set my mind free.

I thought of the Martha Graham quote: “Wherever a dancer stands ready, that spot is holy ground”…and then I realized. I am my meditation room. Wherever I am, I take my holy ground with me. Wherever I can fully be in the moment.. watching ocean waves, or leaves fluttering on a tree, or follow the path of birds riding currents on air, get lost in music I am creating. All of it is a variation on meditation as I see it.

There is great comfort and joy and something special about having a traditional place to contemplate life, the Universe and everything.. the buildup of energy there is tangible. It’s why sometimes people venture into a church or temple without knowing exactly why, other than the pull was there, and comfort and perhaps realizations were found.

I am so grateful that I can find this wherever I go- on the train, on a bench in a park, on a walk and stopping and overlooking the city.

My body is my temple, and my mind, its rooms.

Creativity, focus, inspiration, meditation, mindfulness, Personal Development, Personal growth

Singing on the Trail

On my way back down the mountain today, in the distance behind me, I could hear someone singing.. singing deeply from their soul.

I slowed down so I could enjoy the singing. My Spanish is not wonderful, and it’s not in this clip, but I could swear at one point they sang “There are not words in my mouth that say how I feel in my heart”.

My brain shot back in time to a job I had where the custodian, from Laos, sang all the time. He told me the days he sang loudest and longest were the days he was missing his country the most.

I remember years ago I would hear people randomly singing or whistling through their day, and I don’t really hear it much any more. That in part is what made today so special.

I would like there to be ease in the world again where when people felt it rise up, the songs would come, and mingle with those of the birds like they did today.

Affirmations, goal setting, inspiration, journaling, meditation, mindfulness, Personal Development, spirituality

Getting to the Core of Things

Each year I receive a theme for the following twelve months. 2020 found a lot of us rediscovering what we enjoyed doing most when we were young and didn’t have the responsibilities of being an adult, and as I was reading everyone’s reflections of the past year, I realized that the theme for 2021 is CORE. Getting back to the center of things.

As a kid, I loved being in Nature.. wandering the woods looking for mayflowers and magic.. Laying on my belly looking at things up close, and just being. Just being has often revealed so much to me.

In getting to the core.. to the center of who one is, letting go is also a crucial step. Here’s some wisdom from past me around letting go, moving forward, and becoming.

What burdens to you cherish and nurture? What negative mythologies about yourself do you believe to be your unshakable truth? The blocks- real and imagined_ that others and yourself have put in your path? What are your “I will never”s.. your “yeah,buts”… your “I always”? Your “I am not worthys”. Your “those sorts of things are for other people, not me.” Your “I want it, but deep down I don’t believe I deserve it”s. Your armor. Your shields. Your crutches.

Now think… what is your deepest desire? Your core truth. What you have worked to become. Your “someday I want”s.

Our past experience shapes us, but does not have to continue to define who we are, or who we want to/are destined to become.

Truth changes breath to breath; it based in the past. Are you willing to release your burdens, your mythologies, your negative tapes so you can begin to become your Self?

When we are babies, every thing we do and see is a new experience. each step a risk, and often a delight. As an adult it can be a challenge to see life as an unfolding of newness, but it is possible… and it can also feel frightening.

Take a moment to inhale deeply, then sigh it out. If water flows from your eyes, let it flow. Exhale until you feel the cracking in your spine. Feel the burdens fall off like scales. Stretch your fingers and toes as far as you can and release. Feel the pulsing of life.

Internalize:
I am open to receive all the good things.
I am unstoppable.
I am serenity.
I am jou.
I am worthy.
I am strong.
I am powerful.
I am humble.
I act for The Greater Good.
I am Love, and I am loved.

Thank you for reading. I love you.