As I was sitting in the plumeria grove yesterday, drifting in and out of meditation, I looked down to see my left hand completely in shadow, and my right hand completely lit up.
I’ll admit. I spent a bit of time figuring out how to photograph it; it was quite lovely. I settled back in again. Enjoying the solitude, the breeze, watching the parrots’ sideways walking on the branches.
I began to think of shadows.. and the concept of shadow work. So many times when shadow work is talked about, it’s meant the parts of us we don’t like. Or trauma we have experienced. Things we’ve shoved way back in our brain cupboards. Unwanted, and yet, we can’t quite bring ourselves to get rid of them either.
And then I thought… “what if” … and if you’ve known me any length of time you know how fond I am of “what if” being a jumping off point for exploration rather than a tsunami of anxiety….
What if there are things in the shadows that are wonderful, and precious, and maybe our deepest true self? Tucked away because they were “too”. Too odd. Too bold. Too different. Maybe tucked away out of fear of losing what is familiar- groups of people we relate to, too big a challenge to our sense of self. Hidden behind a big ol’ box of What Will Other People Think. Requiring the deepest relational commitment of all. To our Self.
This and. Not either or.
As we look into the shadows, healing wounds and discovering treasures, it’s important to be compassionate with ourselves, and with others. There might be a whole lot of internal work that happens that will shock people who knew one aspect of you, when they suddenly meet your next incarnation
(there can be many incarnations within one lifetime, I feel)
Like back in high school math class, when I sometimes just knew the answer to a complex problem. The teacher would challenge me to “show my work” and I couldn’t, because I simply knew the answer by looking at it.
One of my friends has been posting amazing images of all the monarch butterflies emerging in their yard this Spring. It’s amazing to watch the chrysalis go from a green and gold jewel to clear, and then the butterfly makes its way out, transformed.
I have so many life shifts happening right now. The very pragmatic and fast approaching need to find where “home” is next. Work that is not so hard on my body and spirit. And beautiful inner alchemy.
So yes, I may seem the same, yet somehow different. I can hardly wait to step out of the shadows, into the light.
Shining.
Radiant.
And to hug those I love so much.T
hanks for reading.I love you.
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