Tag: life

inspiration, instinctive meditation, journaling, Memories, spirituality, writing

Conversations with My Self

Adele Satori
Image is a color digital collage I created of a mine tunnel with broken tracks, and a large blue eye looking into it. The eye appears to be reflecting the other end of the tunnel.

Sometimes my meditations take the form of an inner conversation, I suppose you could call it. It’s all in words. Some days it stays internal, and some days it flows onto page or screen.

This morning I was thinking back to a chat I’d had with a friend recently, where I was questioning my Why of existence– from the perspective of what is my overarching purpose. What arose is that my primary purpose is to witness the small moments.

I thought how remembering these small moments transmits them back to the universe– whether you view it as pranashakti, God, some ethereal council of beings, or something else entirely. Or nothing. It could be “live stream” (I just mistyped this as “love stream” a few times, and that’s not inaccurate!) or when hopefully long from now I leave this body and report back. Despite the horrors that we are bombarded with daily (and some experience), there is this:

“Look how wondrous this existence has been!”

Texture of bark on my favourite trees. I spent awhile this morning visiting each of them.

The day I noticed each tree has its own song when the wind caresses it.

The dance of shadows, and how sometimes I can see the faeries hiding there.

When I see a plant waving, and there’s no wind my skin can feel.

The lap of The Wise Old Tree in Minneapolis fit me perfectly, and I received from her exactly what I needed every time.

Sunlight shining through flower petals and butterfly wings.

Buzzing of bird wings when they fly closely.

How once a hummingbird hovered so closely to me I could feel the breath of its wings. And how delightful it is to hear their little beep beeps and watch them ride invisible rollercoasters when they are showing off to each other.

Bees with their pollen pants. One day I noticed a bee with **purple**polling plants, which expanded my knowledge of what colour pollen is.

One day I followed a bee on its journey until it went where a mere human couldn’t follow.

The smell of breakfast as I pass homes on Sunday morning walks.

Backyard conversations floating on the air.

Laughing with friends from the depths of our souls.

When breath sounds like the ocean, and the ocean, breath.

Seeing people’s inner child come out when they get an ice cream cone.

Looks shared between people tells one a lot about how they are relating to each other in that moment, or maybe always.

Witnessing fear course through a small child when a loud noise startled them. Not knowing what they might have experienced, assuring them they were safe in this moment. And thinking how many children do not have this assurance or safety.

How soft the sweater is of a neighbour I’ve only waved to when we finally took a moment to share each other’s names.

Appreciating the delicious feeling of my bed every night, and the gratitude I have for this experience, and a place to stay inside every day. Being cozy in bed when it’s raining.

Warmth of a lemon in my hand that someone picked from their tree and gave to me while I was out walking, and the fresh lemon scent that filled my apartment when I got home.

Times my words and presence have lifted someone up, and the times when I have not been my best. When I remember these less than stellar times, I whisper “I’m sorry” to these people, and let it go.

The joy I have of being able to sing around the house without being asked to stop, and the joy of a friend or family member joining in.

I used to hear people singing or whistling in public, and I don’t hear that much any more.

The peace of quiet when I wake up in the middle of the night, and there’s no traffic.

The bliss of sitting in my car for a moment when I come home, even though I live alone.

The beautiful community I have with my current neighbours. We take care of each other without getting into each other’s business, and I cherish it.

So much more. Every day there’s one small thing I can tuck away in the scrapbook of my heart and pull out at any time.

No big achievements by societal standards. Simply witnessing and Being in this world.

What have you witnessed today?

daring, goal setting, inspiration, instinctive meditation, journaling, meditation, Personal Development, Personal growth, risk

The Courage to Fail

Adele Satori
Image shows the word FAILED, with a rectangular border, at an angle. Both word and border are red.


I was talking with an accountability partner the other day. They were expressing frustration as a leader, when they didn’t how to more effectively approach team members that kept doing the same thing, the same way, and failing.

We’ve all done it at some point. Try the same thing the same way over and over, and fail. Our brains just can’t seem to figure it out. It’s like a dog trying to go through a narrow opening with a long stick.

Perhaps we see a team member or colleague follow the same pattern, with an unsuccessful outcome. As a leader, we make the same suggestion, over and over, and have the same result. We can see so clearly what they should be doing differently, and the desired outcome just doesn’t materialize. We can’t figure out a way to advise the person in a way they will understand.

In either case, there can be the pressure of “I/we don’t have time to fail”, which can add another layer of real and/or perceived obstacles.

When we fail within ourselves, we will sometimes give up in frustration. When failure arises in a group, the outcome of the efforts of the entire team can be affected. A person may end up feeling stigmatized and be less willing to take risks in the future.

As a leader, there is a delicate balance between catching the action in the moment and reestablishing the flow, or risking calling out a person in front of their peers and souring group dynamics. If there’s a potential learning opportunity for the entire group, find a way to reshape the process for the team.

Try brainstorming together. Understanding that people learn in many different ways, this can create a collaboration that accommodates the different styles that works for everyone. It gives space for the team to support and nurture each other’s success.

If it’s more appropriate to work with the person one on one, ask them to describe their process. It could reveal where the glitch is, and how to fix it. It’s important that people feel empowered in their improvement, and not shamed. Talking through their routine can create space for them to have their own aha moment.

One of the benefits of creative practice is you build your failure muscle. That is, you build your willingness to fail in a new way... even courage to fail in a new way. Curiosity and exploration can lead to doing things in ways you hadn’t considered before, and lead to the desired result.

So how can one do this in ordinary, non-creative practice life? It’s a matter of burning new pathways. Our brain has learned a way that doesn’t work, and it stubbornly won’t give it up!

Engage in visualization and/or meditation.
An individual or group can practice visualization, where a process is rehearsed internally, and then apply the new process in real time. Allow all the possibilities to flow through imagination. This combined with brainstorming can encourage innovative thinking and outcomes.

Recall a time you did succeed… either in the actions where you are currently failing, or something completely different. When we succeed, we often can feel it coming, dropping into the zone where everything seems to magically fall into place. Replay those moments in your mind.. how it felt, what you did.. engaging fully with all your senses.

In addition to visualization, meditation practice in general invites a deeper connection to self and the world around us. In Instinctive Meditation®, which I practice, all is welcome. It’s not about blocking things out, but allowing it all to arise, and let the mind do it’s thing.

Do something seemingly unrelated to what you were doing.
In creative practice, I will sometimes work in a different medium- maybe even one I’ve never worked with before. We’ve all sucked at trying something new, until we start to understand the properties of what we’re working with. If you learned to ride a bike, play a musical instrument, or learn a new work procedure, you likely failed a few times before you “got” it.

In a group setting, where practical, cross training might be successful, or even show strengths that weren’t apparent in a different role. This can be another opportunity to involve the whole group in exercises. These could include incorporating movement and rhythm, writing up procedure manuals together, and so on.

Once when I was teaching kids of a broad age range, the littles weren’t getting the concept of weaving. I made up a game, on the spot, where we held hands and wove over and under each other. It helped! My typing teacher (ancient times!) had us imagine a song with good rhythm in our heads to help our typing speed and consistency.

Model the actions of someone you admire.
Who is successful in doing something you’d like to do? Watch successful plays of sport figures, teams, or dancers and try out their moves. What does a speaker, singer, or writer do to warm up? Try out their routines or drills. Set up an interview with someone who is where you want to be, and ask them how they got there.. what their successes and failures have been. Some of the people I admire most have had some pretty spectacular failures. Ask someone to be your mentor. Find an accountability partner.

Don’t take your failures personally.
This can be a tough one, especially for those of us who’ve internalized stories of not meeting the expectations of those who rely on us, or been met with a rejection if we don’t meet high standards. Your self talk might reflect this… “I never… I always… what made me think I could.. ” If you come up against this obstacle, it can be a good time to work with a life guide of some sort. Journaling and meditation can also be useful tools.

Failure is part of being human! It’s how we learn.
You will fail at some things. Remember that you succeed at many more! Failing lets us know we are stretching our capacity to grow. Give yourself permission to fail. This is where deliberate practice of any kind is so important. It allows you to explore without expectation of outcome. To more deeply connect with process and self.

Be willing to have the courage to fail in a new way.

creative practice, inspiration, instinctive meditation, journaling, meditation, mindfulness, perception, Personal growth, plants

The Dance of Opening

Adele Satori
Image shows white wild iris with purple center.

Life-changing events aren’t always monumentous, boisterous, or catastrophic. Sometimes they are subtle, silent, and a matter of timing.

The other day I was sitting next to a koi pond at the Self-Realization Fellowship International Headquarters. I closed my eyes for a moment, to better take in the sound of bird songs mingled with distant traffic, the scent of the nearby pines, and the peaceful play of the water falling into the pond.

I opened my eyes and noticed that a single petal of an iris bud was reaching out. As I was admiring shape of the petal, and the pattern of the yellow markings, something amazing happened. Very slowly, the rest of the petals opened, ever so slightly. My had flew up to my mouth in shocked awe of the best kind. When I was a kid, one of my favourite things was watching timelapse movies of flowers blooming, and here I was, witnessing a flower opening itself up to the world, right in front of me!

I became so attuned to that single flower that everything else fell away. The petals were performing a blossom butoh- slowly pulsing slightly opened and closed. If I hadn’t been paying attention I wouldn’t have noticed. Each dance open a little further out, and each dance in a little less closed.

There was no breeze. I then saw that before each movement outwards, the stem of the plant did a slight undulation. rising up to the flower to give it momentum to open a little more.

The whole while, I sat there with silent tears making their way down my cheeks. My whole being was filled with wonder and connection to creation. And I thought what an apt metaphor the opening of a flower is to one’s own journey of growth- unfolding to reveal the beauty that’s hidden within.

When the flower’s dance had slowed to the point I could no longer perceive it, I stood up, bent over close to it, whispered “thank you” and walked through the rest of the grounds, pausing now and then to witness the slight movement of leaves and fronds.

I walked out the gates a different person than I was walking in- maybe myself a little more open. I saw it as a sign to have find the courage to unfold, and reveal the beauty hidden inside.

I invite you in the coming days to make time to sit and witness more intimately the world around you. The songs of birds. Shapes of clouds. The pulse of life around you. What subtle moment might transport you into a new way of being?